.Easy Life Hacks by Sagar -
Why I (almost) Quit Social Media Products
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This article was not written by me one day, because I was in a Bad Mood on that day 😂 It has also not been written as an encouragement to anyone to Quit Social Media, and I'm purely saying that, because everyone's life and journey is unique.
If you may have read my 'Awakening' Page on Social Media
, you may have thought that I despise YouTube, Instagram, TikTok, and other similar products. The answer to that is Yes and No.
Wait, I never encouraged anybody to quit these products. In fact, I've said that quitting them altogether would be like alienating. However, being a real human being amongst Social Media Zombies would not be that alienating, I think 😂
Now, Instagram is way more fair than TikTok. TikTok used to clear out my Bio within 5 minutes of me writing 'Gay' in it. They also disabled my hashtag #DanceWithSagar, because I was getting too popular. Absolutely cheap and shitty, isn't it?! That's not how Instagram is. They are still very very unfair with me - as in - I'm sure their excel sheets have criteria like, "If Old and Does NOT have wrinkles, suppress!" 😂 "If Old and Has Many Wrinkles, BOOST"! so that this Gen-Z would be like, "Oh! This uncle is such an inspiration!" So, Instagram is waiting for me to get wrinkles, I think 😵 Now, again, YouTube is way way way more fair than Instagram. Not 100% fair, but at least they didn't age-discriminate against me i.e. they let people see my videos despite me having no wrinkles 😁 , which I come to know via Grindr.
So, it's all connected, and it's all good. It gives me the opportunity at this perfect time in my life to share my life's experiences. Despite saying that - why did I almost quit them all for a specific period of time? Let me tell you my reasons:
REASON # 1: TIME
Everything that we achieve in life is by the virtue of FOCUS. You may have read about that in 'Think & Grow Rich' (the original book where ideas of 'Thoughts', 'Feelings' & 'Vibrations' have been elucidated).
Earlier, Entertainment was available only in Cinemas or Television. Later, I remember how we used to buy CDs and DVDs and watch movies on our Computers. Here, I'm referring to Motion Pictures Entertainment i.e. Films, and the elements it encompasses viz., Songs.
I remember how we used to limit our time on Video Games, because we knew that they were time-consuming. We didn't think of them as being 'addictive', because even though they were popular amongst us (teenagers) in the 1990s, they were not as prolific as they are today.
Now, all forms of entertainment have come onto our palms (in the form of Mobile Phones). 'Bollywood' is already dangerous - wherever it is, but the fact that it has come home, in a way, makes our lives capricious 💀
It's not just about checking Notifications / Likes / Views / Analytics anymore. It's about the AMOUNT OF TIME we waste behind something that isn't giving us a soul-satisfying experience. Video Games or Social Media are addictive, because they are not Soul-satisfying.
We are eternal beings, but how much you can achieve / manifest within a lifetime depends on how much FOCUSED TIME you give it, and if you can't provide FOCUSED TIME to your Desire, you can't really expect to manifest it. Time once lost can never be regained.
That is why it was important for me to give myself some BREATHING SPACE. That was my primary reason! Probably THE MOST IMPORTANT.
REASON # 2: DELUSIONS OF GRANDEUR
Bollywood (a derogatory term for the Hindi film industry) has ruined our perceptions of looking at a variety of areas in life, including (but not restricted to) the definition of SUCCESS. We consider FAME, POPULARITY, CELEBRITY-STATUS as the ideal parameters for a Happy Life, and without that we do not consider ourselves to be important or even valuable.
I can imagine a bunch of frustrated and evil-minded people in powerful / influential positions (e.g. those into Mass Influence) plotting ways to manipulate people's thinking habits and modify their behavior. Many statements / one-liners / television shows / movies / songs / dialogs were (and are still) made with such intentions.
Social Media products like YouTube, Instagram, TikTok (and others) tend to promise fame without really spilling an important secret - that you need to create an impact IRL (in real life) before thinking of reaching a high status on the products. Without knowing that we tend to create Content, spend our resources (time, money, things, vehicles), and put in all our efforts and Energy that we don't even realize that it's wasted effort.
While the products have their own criteria for making chosen ones popular, we are given - what's technically called - Intermittent Reinforcement (IR) (boost every few weeks), making us develop a sense of relevance to this world.
While the IR varies from person-to-person depending on their age, gender, location, and other physical characteristics, this generates a delusional sense of grandness amongst us - more so amongst the younger generation who are the primary targets of these products.
I wanted to ensure that I develop a sense of REALITY and RELEVANCE IRL (in real life) and stay away from such delusions. It is so important to do good things in real... basically, DO REAL THINGS, because that gives you a better sense of satisfaction than generating content online that nobody really cares about or remembers. That's another story that people still remember my musical.ly's "Kaay Baai Sangu..." video, but still !
While it is important that we STOP being under such 'bad' people's capricious malevolence, and use our own brains, Social Media products tend to become new avenues for all the suppressed feelings within. So, those people with malicious intentions are still ruling our Minds, in a way. Even though I stopped watching Hindi movies / shows long long ago for the dirt and filth that is sneakily fed into everyone's Minds, staying away from these products for External Validation, Temporary Pleasure, and Acceptance.
REASON # 3: LIVING OFFLINE
You can only do a few things in a day. You can only do a limited number of things in your lifetime. The more importance you give to one aspect of life, you tend to deviate from other aspects of life.
I felt that I wasn't giving the desired importance to my real life.
When you have chatted with 10 people online in a day, shared your days events with others via Instagram stories, garnered likes, you feel that you are done for the day and that you don't really need or have much to do offline. This tendency to please yourself online using short-term and futile methods does not really help you grow as a human being.
You don't tend to deliberately step out, interact with real people, and get a soul-satisfying experience.
And when did this becomes a daily habit, you realize that you are actually wasting your life for just a few Likes from strangers (who don't really care) and (worse) Social Media bots.
to prove to myself that I can
stay away from these addictive products
and still lead a happy life.
The most important reason, probably, that I want to state in a slightly exaggerated manner is that: I was LONELY in life. I created my website, because there was nobody to LISTEN. "Blessed with Bad Listeners!". Started using Grindr, TikTok, Instagram, YouTube to curb that loneliness. Found out that I was, in fact, now, lonelier in real life. You THINK you are connected with others, but you're actually not. So, instead of working on the Root Cause, we are, somewhere, working on the Symptom (a beautiful line that I recently heard from a doctor). The feeling of "being connected" did not percolate down in my real life. In fact, loneliness kept perpetuating and aggravating in my life, and I realized that I am still the same person in 2023 that I was back in 2013. That part was scary.
Many people get depressed, because of Social Media. And many depressed people go to Social Media to cure it, and get depressed even more.
REASON # 4: ENTERTAINMENT OVERDOSE
Entertainment is a way to recharge, reboot, and refresh ourselves, and I believe it is essential to our well-being. It's like eating Pani Puri every 15 days! I do that.
Earlier, we used to wait for Sunday mornings (8 am) when Chitrahaar used to be played on television, however, we were not impatient throughout the week. We used to be busy and happy in our own lives. The wait for Chitrahar used to start only after remembering that the next morning is Sunday Morning.
Then we got Cable T.V.s. We used to request the 'Cable waalaa' to play specific movies, and, sometimes, he used to listen to us. We had VCR at home as well. Then we bought a double-sided Audio Cassette Player in which we could record Audio on one side, and only play on the other side. I remember I've edited & remixed so many Hindi Movie songs in the 90s during my teenage. It was so much fun.
But you get the point. That is how much 'Bollywood' (derogatory term) was part of our lives. Then came DTH, and so many choices of Entertainment Channels. I remember watching 'Hum Paanch', 'Zee Horror Show' (Pankaj Dheer, Shagufta Ali, Archana Puran Singh), and 'Aahat' the most.
Then came the Internet, CDs, DVDs through which we consumed entertainment. Until this point is was controllable. However, now that entertainment has reached our houses via Mobile Phones, it gets too overwhelming. Even Instagram (that I keep calling bad) has A LOT OF GOOD videos (i.e. REELS). I got so see so many new things on it. However, the only problem is that it's just TOO MUCH, and because it is Entertaining and Exciting, it gets Addictive, and that's bad.
ABSTINENCE BENEFITS
Gosh! Sounds like sex! 😂 . I am a very very creative person. I like doing multiple things. I like doing things differently. I have innovated so many small-small things at my workplace, which I was always rewarded for.
However, Social Media is not the place for Talent, and I totally understand the logic behind it. If you are talented, a good actor, or a good dancer, you should move to Mumbai, for instance, and pursue work there, but I think it's too late for me, which is why I've got the opportunity to (i) show some creativity on the Social Media, and (ii) do something that I wanted to do since my childhood (i.e. enact a female, rather, be it in those acts), but this is like entering into a competition with the world (that too at this age), the result of which, therefore, becomes quite precarious.
Now, my childhood (80s) has been tough - I was born with the feelings of a girl. My teenage was tough (90s) - I wanted to be a girl. My adulthood i.e. 20s was tough (2000s) - I fell in love with the wrong people, and eventually attracted a spouse whom I couldn't get along for even 1 minute. My mid-age i.e. 30s (2010s) was full of cleaning all that up, when I also ended up in wasting my (what I like to call) "green phase" of life. Now, I am in my 40s, the happiest ever, but exactly in / around 2012 (during my 30s) is when Social Media products (viz., Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, and TikTok) came into my life to take my focus away from fixing the issues that I may have accumulated over all these years. I would have been better off, if I did the self-work a bit early.
Therefore, it is my strong advice that if you want mental stability in your life, you MUST restrict your daily time on the Social Media. Just for saying this this article might not reach certain people, but I can't not say it, right? You can't stay away for 6 months, and then get back into the same vicious cycle. And I don't think that would happen. When you take those 6 months to RESET, REORGANIZE, and REFLECT upon what your life's goals are, then you won't continue using these products in the same manner as before. However, if you don't do anything with your life in that period, and stay with the same hollowness, your habits will come back to you with lightning speed.
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